"Hosties" Animated Commercial
TELEVISION SCREEN - COMMERCIAL
Two cartoon ALTAR BOYS sift through their bowls of cereal.
ALTAR 1
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The same boring cereal again?
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A cheesy CARTOON CHRIST floats down from above.
CHRIST
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Man cannot live on boring cereal alone!
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ALTAR 1 & 2
Jesus pulls a box of HOSTIES cereal from his sash.
CHRIST
CL on cereal pouring into a bowl. It's shaped like Eucharistic hosts. Milk follows.
CHRIST VO
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New Hosties is fortified with vitamins and
minerals, topped off with an angelic kiss of
frosting that stays crispy in milk!
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Christ's hands on their shoulders, the Altar Boys down their cereal happily.
CHRIST
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Hosties is an important part of any nutritious
breakfast, and each one is blessed by a high
ranking Vatican Monsignor - good for the body, and
good for the soul. But make sure you've confessed
beforehand...
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Altar 2 clutches at his throat, gasping.
ALTAR 2
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I... I touched... m..myself! I'm...s...sorry...
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CHRIST
(smiling benignly)
Altar 2 stops choking and continues eating, happily.
CHRIST
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So try a bowl of Hosties! And don't just take my
word for it...
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A cartoon POPE pops out of the box, eating a spoonful of cereal.
POPE
INT. GLICK'S OFFICE - DESK
A hand switches off the TV Pan up to Cardinal Glick, all smiles.
GLICK
Bethany, Rufus, Jay and Silent Bob are at a total loss for words.
JAY
(After a long beat)
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Does it come in chocolate flavor?
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The Cardinal picks up a golf putter and begins putting into an overturned glass.
GLICK
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You see? Now this one's got vision!
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(to Jay)
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We're rolling out the flavors in September. Big
cereal month with the kids, back to school and
all.
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BETHANY
GLICK
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Exactly! And that's what we're looking to do -
shake these people up a bit, get them motivated.
That's the whole point of the campaign. Mass
attendance is at an all-time low in this country.
And it's not like we're losing them to the
Protestants or Baptists - people aren't practicing
at any denomination these days. If we can sell
them some show - let 'em know the Catholic church
has some panache, we can win them back - even get
some new ones. Fill them pews, people - that's the
key. And cross-promoting - like with the cereal
tie-in grabs the little ones as well. Hook 'em
while they're young.
(sits at his desk, lights smoke)
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"Hosties" Animated Commercial (Macromedia Flash)
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