Posted by phone monkey at jerry1.healthpartners.com on February 28, 2002 at 17:01:44:
In Reply to: Dude, you DEFINITELY weren't a guilty party. posted by Isis on February 28, 2002 at 16:38:35:
thought about this.
Funny thing about humor, ...
... when a joke doesn't work, or when we try to explain why we are laughing at something we shouldn't, it's very revealing. Who laughs, who doesn't. Who speaks up and who doesn't.
Back a couple of years ago, I was working in a very gay-concentrated environment, about 50-50 or so division between straight and gay, but you'd have to do the census again every few months to see where some people stood.
Anyhow, a friend had come from a lecture and said the lecturer had said that the straight community has no right to comment on the personal habits of someone who is gay.
I said, Bullshit. If a friend of mine is blowing it in personal relationships, straight or gay, I'm going to tell them. I don't care their gender stance - some things you just say because you have to say them.
It caused a sudden shift in my relationship with some of my gay coworkers. They seemed to believe I really meant that.
And, being socially awkward, I had not even realized that my comments on some aspects of their life had been interpreted as being related to their being gay.
And they really weren't because I have lousy radar on that.
Point being, you've got the courage of your convictions. Good for you.