Posted by Nadine at host8-178.rancor.birch.net on November 24, 2003 at 13:54:12:
In Reply to: The Perils of Meeting Kevin Smith posted by Vlad St. Valentine on November 24, 2003 at 13:51:18:
: I was having a bad day so I decided to visit thE View Askew Website to
: watch some spots of Kevin on Leno. Well I was watching the clip from
: the set of Jersey Girl (oh that Affleck) when I saw it. No it wasn't that
: lovely picture of Mewes' crack, it was an add for Wizard World Texas! I
: knew that this would be my one chance to meet the duo that have caused
: so many happy moments in my life (not to mention one really bad one
: when I was so into "Mallrats" I said yes to my girlfriend when she asked
: if she was getting fat). So scrapping together what little money I had,
: being a full-time college student, and went out and bought my ticket to
: the Convention for Sun. I also then went out and bought all the Smith
: DVD's I didn't already own b/c signing VHS's is lame.
: So the day came. I woke up early and arrived to find out Kevin was
: signing autographs at 1:30. I then began to inquire as to how I could
: meet the man. Then everyone of my fragile dreams was shattered when I was
: told that tickets to meet Smith were long gone. I dropped to my knees
: in tears spilling my dvd's on the floor, and with fist raised hi I
: screamed "DAMN YOU, KHAN!!" I fantically went about trying to find a ticket.
: I then found someone who could help me. A person who I thought to be
: Matt Damon told me they would give me a ticket for some oral. It turned
: out to be Hilary Swank and she was really quite gentle, but I came to
: find out she didn't really have a ticket and this boy began to cry.
: I then decided it was hopeless and the bast I could do was catch a
: glimpse of Kevin and Jason. But upon approaching the area I was stopped
: by security and asked for a ticket. When I told them I had none they
: called in a code blue. Appearently code blue means- take the fat kid to a
: dark room and beat his ass mercilessly until he forgets who even Kevin
: Smith is. So the security nerds went at me for hours with those custom
: lightsabers they sell at the show, all the while screaming "Who's the
: Jedi Master now, BITCH!"
: In the end I didn't meet or even see Kevin Smith or Jason Mewes. I
: lost my "Clerks", and "Mallrats" DVDs. I did however leave with a
: pre-viewed copy of Vulgar signed by my new favorite writer/director Bryan
: Johnson.