Posted by LunchBoxxx at user-1121qr0.dsl.mindspring.com on June 16, 2002 at 13:50:36:
So What.....Kev cast J-Lo in his next movie. Regardless of her abilities as an actress, or lack there-of, she will open up Kev's work to some new demographics besides the white, geeky suburban male. This means more Money at the box-office which in turn will equate to more movies by Kevin Smith. J-Lo will draw in the black and hispanic male demographics from the inner-city. New Jersey is right between New York and Philadelphia....Anyone ever seen a black or hispanic person in either of those cities?? I could be wrong but I think that there might even be some black and hispanic people in california too. If I were the "typical" Kevin Smith fan I would be less concerned with J-Lo's presence and performance in the film and start to be more concerned with how you are gonna get your dorky asses back out of that theater with your nikeys, your wallet, and your cell-phone intact ecspecially when the J-Lo fan demographic realizes this is a pg-13 film and they aren't going to get to see any T&A. They are gonna be pissed and who are they gonna blame.............You guessed it "WHITEY"! Just pray Kevin puts J-Lo in a thong bikini just before/during the end credits so the pathetic geek demographic can sneak out and run for safety while clutching their paltry belongings close to their chest.
J-Lo's acting abitlity can't be any worse than any of the other actor's/actresses in Kevin's films but that was part of those films' charm. I'm sure if Kevin can make Mewes and Affleck come across as entertaining instead of pathetic then he can make J-Lo tolerable to watch. It could be worse...Kevin could have cast Rosie O'Donnell or Chelsea Clinton. Good Luck Mr. Smith....I look forward to renting this film when it makes it to DVD.
P.S.
Kevin,
I have a really great script but I want it to be super great like all your work so do you think you could get suzanne the ape to look over for me and make some corrections? And if its not too much to ask could you give me a part as an extra in the movie....You don't actually have to put me in the movie just cut me a check for 10 bucks so I can say I was in the movie but you cut the part I was in out and that way it saves us both a lot of trouble and I can show my pathetic friends the check stub as proof because I'm just dying for loser-dorks to be impressed by me. If you can't do any of that then could you just ignore me so I can tell people that I'm so obnoxious that a real life director is ignoring my feeble attempts at humor and sarcasm. Thanks....I don't care what Linda Forentino or Shannon Dougherty says about you....your alright in my book. I was just kidding about waiting to rent Jersey Girl....I'll see it in the Theater Like I did all your other movies but if I get mugged or beaten it will be your fault.