funny story. NT


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Posted by y4o2d0a at dial4-236.bluegrass.net on August 28, 2001 at 13:23:26:

In Reply to: The effects of life, angst, and JSBSB... (txt) posted by The Right Reverend on August 28, 2001 at 12:53:06:

: This gave me a chuckle:
: > See, the way I look at it is like this:
: > The next level is fun. not many people venture
: > there and the ones that do find ample rewards.
: > I don't know why people fear the next level...
: > they call it uncouth, barbaric, even
: > embarassing... But I... I strive for the next
: > level... Allow me to elaborate...
: > (Dick and Chris: I was sober this time, which
: > brings me to a belated apology for anything I
: > may have said that personally offended either
: > of you. If I did or said anything that you
: > found OFFENSIVE, my bad. If I was just
: > embarassing as hell... groovy. I needed that
: > night more than I can tell you).
: > Anyhow, yeah... next level...
: >
: > As you all know, the past few months have
: > been... difficult. And for some reason that
: > came to a head tonight. Maybe it was Jay and
: > Silent Bob, maybe it was stress, maybe it was
: > the knowledge of quickly approaching the 4-year
: > mark, maybe it was a mixture of all those
: > thigns, but there I sat after the movie on a
: > friend's porch enjoying a beer. There was this
: > cute little blonde sitting next to me and for
: > some reason or another (theys ay it was
: > accidental) flung out her hand that was holding
: > her bottle of Red Stripe.
: > Her open bottle of Red Stripe.
: > Her open bottle of Red Stripe that effectively
: > emptied itself on my face, my chest, my crotch,
: > and my legs when she flung her hand out.
: > Oh there were mighty chuckles all around. I
: > smiled and picked up a bottle of PBR, covered
: > the mouth with my thumb, and shook it
: > violently. Oh, how everyone laughed at the idea
: > of Rob spraying beer all over the girl who had
: > just made it very difficult to explain to the
: > officer who, if fate were a true bitch, would
: > pull me over later that night and ask if I had
: > been drinking. (That didn't happen, but it
: > could have... I mean I REEKED.)
: > I aimed the bottle and let fly the furies
: > buried within that brown bottle of love. The
: > beer erupted out and hit her squarely in the
: > face (Shut up, Freud), her hair, her ear, her
: > clothes, her chest... oh her ample
: > white-clothed chest....
: > Yeah, I laughed and laughed and laughed. As she
: > stomped into the house with her boyfriend (Who
: > looked an awful lot like Rocky, mind you -
: > that's the guy from Aimesville. not Balboa), I
: > laughed some mroe. Then I realized everyone was
: > dead silent.
: > What else could I do at that point in time but
: > quote Mikey - albeit under my breath since the
: > windows were open and she was standing next to
: > it - "Eh, she wasn't going to fuck me anyway."
: > Which caused me to laugh some more.
: > All in all, everyone thought I was a big
: > asshole about the whole thing, but I see it as
: > an eye for an eye. And a hell of a way to bring
: > a laugh... at least for me.
: > Oh, yeah, here's the neato part. I was sober.
: > Imagine that.
: > While, no, this wasn't a big deal when you
: > think too much about it, but I just wish you
: > all had seen the look on that girl's face when
: > the beer hit her. It was priceless. And the
: > stunned look on everyone else's face...
: > marvelous. It was a moment in time that I will
: > forever cherish. So, don't be afraid to follow
: > that first impulse. Sure, it's probably not the
: > socially correct thing to do, but I promise you
: > that good or bad it will stand out in your mind
: > for a long, long time.
: >
: > Besides, she was a prissy little cunt.
: > r




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