By MIKE LENGYEL
News Askew Writer

SAN DIEGO, California (NA) – July 16, 2005

“I do make movies… but I was wondering on how to get them in the hands of someone like you?” asks a young, aspiring indie filmmaker to writer/director, Kevin Smith. His query is quickly met by a barrage of collective sighs and beleaguered “boos” stemming from a mob of 6,500 displeased fans, who are more eager to hear Smith make with the funny, rather than cater to answer one’s own self-serving desperate plea at getting his foot in the door.

But rather than chastise the young man, Smith instead decides to take what appears to be the high road and quickly jumps to his defense, addressing the crowd. “Don’t ‘boo’ him. This dude’s got a dream.”

As the chorus of “boos” quickly subsides, Smith focuses his attention back onto the filmmaker and asks, “Are you willing to suck cock for your dream, sir?”

The room quickly erupts into laughter as the filmmaker is left standing at the microphone, face now slightly red with embarrassment and left looking somewhat disheartened, not quite sure of what to make from his hero’s response.

“We all got to start somewhere. You can start on your knees.” continues Smith.

And on that note, this year’s appearance proved to be a welcome return to form for Smith, whose humor and askewed look on life, love and pop culture tends to lend a refreshing breath of air in the midst of the mass-marketing, promotional synergy that is Comic-Con. After taking a year off from 2004’s Con, Smith continues to show that he’s a juggernaut of a performance artist whose comedic reign is one not to be reckoned with - especially when he’s fielding audience questions and answering them with hilarious results.

This year was no exception. Running a bit fashionably behind, Smith quickly opened up the floor to questions, often urging the audience not too waste precious time by clapping after each response.

During one point of the Q & A, Smith was discussing his opinions of Mel Gibson’s ‘PASSION OF THE CHRIST’ and his displeasure at watching a 2-hour long film depicting what he considers to be the least interesting part of Christ’s life and noting that he much more prefers Martin Scorsese’s ‘THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST’ instead. During this point, one dismayed audience member protested Smith’s views by shouting a verbal reminder to Smith that “Jesus died for our sins” several times over, all the while continuing to disrupt the Q & A in attempting to get his point across. At first Smith had difficulty making out his statement.

“Dude, I can’t hear you. Yell it out again.” Smith responded.

“He died for your sins!” the man cried out.

“He died for my sins…? Oh, I totally know that! I’m gonna die for his one day to pay him back!” Smith quickly shot back.

As the man continued his protest, Smith appeared slightly more agitated, however never losing his cool, or his audience.

“Dude, don’t testify. I love Jesus! I love him like… I love him more than you motherfucker!” Smith proudly boasted as he tried to get his point across, which was praised over with laughter from the crowd.

As Smith continued to explain, “My feeling is ‘I love Jesus,’ why would I want to watch a movie in which he gets beat up for 2 hours? Like I would like to watch something more about Christ’s life, you know, what he said and what he did up to that point.”

Later, in switching gears, when asked about the upcoming ‘CLERKS’ sequel, tentatively entitled, ‘THE PASSION OF THE CLERKS’, Smith revealed that a principal photography date of September 12th was set and the shooting would continue through mid-October with hopes that it will be out beginning early next year. Smith also then later went on to reveal that he will indeed be directing the ‘DEGRASSI’ feature next year after he completes ‘THE PASSION OF THE CLERKS’. And while his three episode ‘DEGRASSI – The Next Generation’ story arc is set to air in the states in August, Smith also stated that there will be a ‘JAY and SILENT BOB DO DEGRASSI’ DVD to be released in the fall (October/November) of which will include the three episodes, commentaries and extras alike.

In closing, Smith took the time to introduce fellow writer/director and friend, Richard Kelly, out onstage to discuss his much anticipated follow up to his cult hit, ‘DONNIE DARKO’, entitled ‘SOUTHLAND TALES’, with Smith adding, “which stars a bunch of fuckin’ people like… BUFFY, THE SCORPION KING and… SILENT BOB.” Smith also notes that in conjunction prior to the release of ‘SOUTHLAND TALES’, both he and fellow partner in crime, Bob Chapman of Graffiti Designs, have teamed up with Kelly to produce and publish a six book graphic novel that will serve as a prequel of sorts leading up to the film, which Kelly will also write, with all six books scheduled to be released later this year.

While tight-lipped about the film, Kelly did manage to mention that Smith’s involvement in the film will be playing a wheelchair-bound Iraqi war-vet named Simon Theory, while also stating that filming is scheduled to begin in four-weeks with other casting announcements to be made very soon. Smith also expressed excitement in the film by declaring Kelly’s screenplay in as much as “brilliant” and placing the script’s brilliance in the same league as that of ‘PULP FICTION’.

Kelly meanwhile also acknowledged that the DVD for ‘TALES’ is also in the works and promises “one big, massive, over-priced DVD” which should include a 2-hour documentary on the making of the film by the same team who produced the mock-‘DONNIE DARKO’ documentary which can be found on the recent Director’s Cut of the film on DVD.

Smith, ever being the ringmaster of his own three-ring-circus, made quick last words exiting the stage to remind fans that he has three upcoming DVD’s scheduled for release: ‘MALLRATS: 10th Anniversary’, ‘JAY AND SILENT BOB DO DEGRASSI’ and ‘AN EVENING WITH KEVIN SMITH 2: EVENING HARDER’ all of which are due to be released just in time for the holidays.

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Smith and actor Jason Mewes (Jay & Silent Bob Strike Back) play themselves in all three episodes of the three-part season finale. Alanis Morissette joins the duo in the second of the three half-hour episodes. Morissette plays the Canadian principal who accepts Jay and Silent Bob so they may graduate. The finale will roll out for three consecutive Friday nights — August 12, August 19 and August 26 at 8:00 pm (ET).
In the Degrassi season finale, Smith travels to Canada to film a fictional sequel to the cult-hit Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back. For the ‘sequel’ titled, Jay and Silent Bob Go Canadian, Eh!, director Kevin Smith has chosen Degrassi as the perfect Canadian high school for the shoot. In the Degrassi / J&SB storyline, Jay and Silent Bob (played by Mewes and Smith) come to Canada to get a high school diploma since no high school in the United States will take them. Smith said, “The plot of the movie within the show is so funny, it almost makes me want to shoot the flick for real.”

To his legions of fans on both sides of the border and around the world, Kevin Smith has surpassed cult hero status with a body of work that includes titles Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back, Dogma, the “Jersey Trilogy” of Clerks, Mallrats and Chasing Amy and his most recent title, Jersey Girl.

The three-episode finale is as follows:

• “West End Girls”- Premieres Friday, August 12, 8:00 & 10:00 p.m. (ET) -With a common ex-boyfriend, competing Spirit Squad leadership ambitions, and Manny’s public revelation of Paige and Matt’s affair, Paige and Manny cannot stand each other. And none of this is helped by their shared desire to be Prom Queen. But with the claws bared and the fur flying, these “mean girls” take their war too far. Meanwhile, a chance at stardom could spell the end for Craig and Ashley.

• “Goin’ Down The Road” Part 1- Premieres August 19, 8:00 & 10:00 p.m. (ET) – Alanis Morissette makes a cameo appearance as she plays the Canadian principal who accepts Jay and Silent Bob so they may graduate. Kevin Smith is filming his hot new movie at Degrassi, and while Craig’s thrilled to be helping out, he’s destroyed over the fact that Ashley is going to England without him. Now he needs to figure out what’s really important to him, his health or his love? And Ashley may have another take on things altogether. Meanwhile, Caitlin’s been spending a lot of time with Kevin Smith, and she’s beginning to once again doubt her relationship with Joey.

• “Goin’ Down The Road” Part 2-Premieres August 26, 8:00 & 10:00 p.m. (ET) - Without his medication, Craig’s life seems to be falling apart: he’s fighting with Joey, he’s leaving home again, and when he’s kicked off Kevin Smith’s set after a huge blow-up, Craig has nowhere to run. Meanwhile, Caitlin is no closer to figuring out her situation with Joey and Kevin Smith, but running away from it all is sure looking good to her, too.

Smith recounted how he first encountered Degrassi in a November, 1996 article he wrote for Details Magazine, entitled ‘Obsession Confession’. In the piece, Smith confesses: “I used to work at this convenience store, and on Sunday mornings the only thing that kept me from gutting the customers in a sleepy rage was Degrassi Junior High. See, I had to put the papers together, and I did it while watching double episodes of Degrassi on PBS …” Shortly thereafter, Smith went on to create Clerks (1994), his first “Jersey” Trilogy title and even named one if its characters Caitlin, after his favorite Degrassi character.

Smith and series producer Linda Schuyler kept in touch ever since and the mutual admiration was obvious. Smith is renowned for making references to Degrassi in his movies Clerks, Mallrats, and Chasing Amy. In Chasing Amy, Jason Lee and Ben Affleck discuss their plans for the evening. Ben’s plans include clubbing. Jason, on the other hand, opts for a pizza and watching Degrassi Junior High, an option that intrigues his co-star.

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Chasing Amy question in The Pop Culture Quiz

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Kevin hit the airwaves in Vancouver again with his second KZED 95.3 appearance on the Nat & Drew show.

Listen in to the entire appearance (3 1/2 hours - commercials have been cut - thanks Will):

http://www.viewaskew.com/radio/kzed953.mp3

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Director Kevin Smith (Clerks; Mallrats; Chasing Amy; Dogma; Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back; Jersey Girl) speaks in one-liners, which is a great attribute for an entertainer who will be “a fat man sweating on a stage for four or five hours” in front of 1,000 Vancouverites Saturday night (July 9). For those who can’t afford the $50 admission to the Vogue, the former Vancouver Film School student poured his heart out via cellphone to the Straight:

The Straight question: What do you wish you knew in film school that you know now?

The one-liner: “The more you eat, the less you exercise and the wider your waist gets. If I knew I’d end up looking like my dad, I’d probably choose to eat differently.”

The real deal: “I wish I’d paid more attention in film school [he dropped out four months into his eight-month program]. If I had, I might have made better-looking films. I was never interested in cinematic things; I was interested in character and dialogue.”

The question: Your films aren’t polished. Why do you think they’re successful in spite of that?

The one-liner: “I sold my soul to Satan in ’92. Then I sold it to Jesus right after. I figure they can fight it out and I’ll have a successful film career in the meantime.”

The real deal: “I think they speak to a distinct pocket of youth….I make films for myself; apparently, a lot of people also identify with not getting laid.” (Smith is married and his wife has even appeared in Playboy, but he told the Straight that doesn’t mean he’s getting laid.)

The question: Film schools in Vancouver are booming; hundreds of kids go into the industry each year. So, is there a future in filmmaking?

The one-liner: “Christ, I hope so. I’m banking on it. I’ve had an 11-year run and I don’t know how to do anything else.”

The real deal: “The current crop of directors will die out or become terrible at what they do. So we need new blood and stories to keep cinema interesting.”

The question: Anything else?

The one-liner: “Please come to the show! It’s so much more fun when there’s more people there. Don’t go to the Alanis Morissette show down the street; buy her CD and see my show. I’m missing out on the Alanis Morissette concert, which is pissing me off. I’ll be at the Vogue sweating on-stage. The question and answers go on for a very long time. I’m not high on quality, but I am high on quantity. Plus, they sell booze there.”

The real deal: Uh, that was it. As of press time, a few hundred tickets to the show were still available. Buy them on-line at kevinthevan.com for $50.

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Clerks director will answer your questions, maybe even about Ben and Jen

On stage
An Evening With Kevin Smith
Where: The Vogue Theatre, 918 Granville St.
When: Saturday at 7 p.m.
Tickets: $50, at kevinthevan.com or at the door

Kevin Smith is grousing on his blog about Vancouver weather. He’s also not happy with the Sutton Place Hotel, a few restaurants around town and a snippy desk clerk in Squamish. But, after some great sex with his wife, Jen, and a TiVo’d episode of The Simpsons, all is well.

Smith tells everybody everything. We know he gets up in the morning and, in his words, “takes a dump,” then takes advantage of the down time to check his mail. He’s gained 30 pounds in the last year, quit smoking, and apparently isn’t too happy with buddy Ben Affleck right now — but so far, we don’t know why.

But you can ask him in person on Saturday, and he’ll probably tell you.

The verbose Smith, the infamous director, actor and oh-so-prolific blogger is staging a live question and answer session Saturday at the Vogue, an “audience as straight man” format that proved itself wildly successful a few years ago with the DVD release of An Evening With Kevin Smith.

Smith is in town acting in Susannah Grant’s Catch and Release, but he’s primarily a director himself. The 1994 cult classic Clerks is thought to be his first film, but fanatics and some Vancouverites know that honour belongs to Mae, I (a.k.a. Mae Day: The Crumbling of a Documentary), his Vancouver Film School effort — or lack thereof.

“I was here circa 1992,” Smith tells The Province. “I did four months of the eight-month program.”

It was worth it, he says, because that’s where he met Lower Mainland native Scott Mosier, who remains his production partner. They first teamed to pitch a 10-minute short subject documentary for a VFS major class project.

“I used to walk to the film school at eight o’clock every morning, and man, it was hooker central,” he says. Through that scene, Smith met Emelda Mae, a pre-op transsexual who sang in a club and decided to chronicle her plight in a sensitive character study.

“We had a reputation of being jokers in class, but we made a real serious pitch. We were going to treat it maturely and sensitively. And they bought it.”

Twelve films were pitched, but only four were chosen, with the unsuccessful bidders relegated to crew positions.

Their elation soon turned to dismay.

“We’re like, ‘Oh my god, we’ve succeeded, this is awesome!’” says Smith, “and then we were faced with the task of actually making the documentary. And it was like, ‘I didn’t know we were actually going to have to do it, I just wanted to be one of the ones that were picked!’”

There was little in the way of organization or progress, and Mae eventually dropped out. (”I think she went to have her sex change operation in the Philippines,” recalls Smith). The filmmakers were left with a short clip of a Mae performance at the West End restaurant Doll and Penny’s, and no interviews.

The crew, faced with the same failing grade as the slackers, was livid.

“They kind of turned on us, so I said, ‘Hey let’s do a documentary about how our documentary fell apart.’ So Mae I turned into Mae Day.”

In spite of this measured success, Smith had had enough of film school.

“I don’t think you need to go to film school to direct,” contends Smith. “It’s like writing. You either can or you can’t.”

Smith’s former VFS instructor agrees.

“He didn’t need it,” says Jon Stoddart. “He enjoyed not doing the project the way it was designed, and thinking around the rules. Film school is about structure.”

Smith got half of his tuition back — $4,500 — and threw it into Clerks.

Says Smith: “Ultimately I think I made the right decision, although there are a bunch of film critics out there who felt I should have done at least 10 more years of film school.”

Clerks won accolades from Cannes to Sundance, and Smith went on to make Mallrats, Chasing Amy, Dogma, Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back (the two characters played by Smith and Jason Mewes in almost every film), and Jersey Girl.

Mewes, says Smith, will definitely be in attendance at the Q&A, but he’s not sure about Affleck, the star of a number of Smith flicks and now the husband of Smith’s Catch and Release co-star Jennifer Garner.

“Yeah, what better wedding present to give your new bride than to take her to see your friend who she sees every day at work anyway,” cracks Smith.

“He might go to make sure that I’m not slagging off on him. This would be the one Q&A where I could be telling an Affleck story and he could stand up and say, ‘That’s bullshit!’

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