Billy, Quentin's Bathroom Guy Calls Me

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: I got this call. I thought it was funny, but then, I think I'm funny, so : maybe it's stupid. Either way it's bizarre and I thought you guys might : find it interesting, or funny, or stupid. : Awe fuck it, just flame me! : Here it is verbatim. : VINCE : Breaktime Billiards : CUSTOMER BILLY : Hello is Vince there? : VINCE : This is. : CUSTOMER BILLY : Hi, this is Billy, Quentin gave me your number, said you could help : me. : VINCE : Who? : CUSTOMER BILLY : Quentin. : VINCE : Quentin Tarantino? : CUSTOMER BILLY : Yeah. I'm working on his bathroom and he said you could help me. : VINCE : He did? : CUSTOMER BILLY : Don't you know him? : VINCE : I know who he is, but I don't know him.... Quentin Tarantino the film : maker? : CUSTOMER BILLY : Yeah, this is Vince right? : VINCE : Yeah. : CUSTOMER BILLY : He gave me your card, and said to talk to you. : (Now, I've never met Quentin Tarantino, and as far as I know, he isn't : a customer, but maybe he's been in on my day off. Still, I'm thinking, : Billy is one of my friends (DREW) playing some kind of joke. So I go : with it.) : VINCE : Alright, what can I do for you? : CUSTOMER BILLY : I need some dealers. : VINCE : What? : CUSTOMER BILLY : He said you could hook me up with a dealer. : VINCE : You mean card dealers? : CUSTOMER BILLY : Yeah, we're putting together a game and we need dealers. : VINCE : Oh, you want to assemble a casino night. No, we sell tables. Black : Jack, Poker, Craps tables, but we don't do casino nights. : CUSTOMER BILLY : You sell Black Jack tables? : VINCE : Yeah. : CUSTOMER BILLY : Oh, can you call my boss and tell him that. : (I'm thinking, Call Quentin? OK.) : VINCE : Um, yeah, I guess. : CUSTOMER BILLY : Here, here's his number. : (I write down the number.) : VINCE : What's his name? : CUSTOMER BILLY : Kermit. : VINCE : WHAT? : CUSTOMER BILLY : Kermit the Frog. His name is Kermit, like the frog. : VINCE : OK...... : CUSTOMER BILLY : Thanks. : VINCE : Thank you. : We hang up. Now for a moment I ponder weather to call the number : and ask for Kermit or not. I figure what the hell. It'll make for a good : story. : RECEPTIONIST : Family Entertainment! : VINCE : Hello, is Kermit there? : RECEPTIONIST : He's in a meeting. : (Holy Shit the guy exists.) : RECEPTIONIST : Can I take a message? : VINCE : Yeah, my name is Vince. A guy named Billy told me to call Kermit to : talk to him about Black Jack tables. : RECEPTIONIST : Oh, OK. How much is a crap table? : VINCE : A crap table? : RECEPTIONIST : Yeah, : VINCE : Casino grade or Home? : RECEPTIONIST : Casino. : VINCE : $4400.00 To $6000.00 Depending on size. : RECEPTIONIST : OK, thanks. : VINCE : What do you need them for? : RECEPTIONIST : Parties, we rent them out for parties. : VINCE : Oh, OK. Yeah $4400.00 To $6000.00. : RECEPTIONIST : Currently we're paying $3000.00. : VINCE : Wow, sounds like your doing fine. : RECEPTIONIST : Yeah, we were just calling around to compare prices. : VINCE : OK. : All right, everything passed Kermit's in a meeting isn't funny. I thought : about writing some funny shit that the Receptionist says, but instead I : left it as it happened. Fucking weird huh?

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