Posted by Jason Mack Rocks at surf23270.net.rss.rogers.com on August 25, 2003 at 21:19:41:
In Reply to: Jason Mack's Screenplay... posted by tommybruce on August 25, 2003 at 21:16:06:
: It's very entertaining. I like it. I stongly suggest you cut out about 60 percent of the curses. It just seems like WAY too much, it takes away from the dialog and makes you seem unintelligent. Im sure you can find replacement words. Im a fan of dirty languge and im not saying you should cut it all out, just most of it. I just wanted to say that, and ill give a more detailed opinion after i take a real good look at it. But from what i see here, is the makings of good entertainment
Most of the cursing is done by one character in particular and he is sort of the idiot character. Plus if you read it closely you will see that the character sort of changes from this curse every second line to a more couth individual. Plus there are some times when no other word can take the place of a good "Fuck that". Thank you for the kind praises though.
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