The Script that I asked if I could post

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: Tell me what you think. It's on the short side, but just enjoy. : Geeks : 2/22/03 : A Screenplay By Tom Paquin : Director: Tom Paquin : Executive Producer: Dan Cottle : Camera: Emile Sorger & Robb Dahm : A Quint Studios Production : : The Mission Impossible theme leads us through the opening title, as a hand with a black glove exposes and incredibly big key ring. He fiddles for a key, and uses it in a nearby doorway. His feet stride across the foyer of the house, into the kitchen, up the staircase, and into a room. A sleeping boy, Clark, lies…asleep. The black figure crouches, so their faces meet. The black figure wears a black mask. He slips a pair of headphones over the ears of Clark. By pressing a button, loud heavy metal is heard, muffled from the headphones. Clark screams, looks at the dark figure, screams again, and leaps back at his bed. The shadowy figure removes his mask, exposing the face of Bruce. : BRUCE : Greetings! I am Darth Vader, from the planet Vulcan. : Clark : You gotta stop doing that! And that was a horrible display of homage to a good flick like back to the future. : BRUCE : C’mon! today’s the big day! : CLARK : Huh? : BRUCE : We’re gonna be two of the first people to see Star Wars: Episode I: The Phantom Menace! : CLARK : Dude, it’s five in the morning. : BRUCE : I’ve been up since three…If we wait, there won’t be any seats left in the theatre. We gotta Hobo to get into the twelve ‘O five show. C’mon, get dressed. : Clark goes to his closet. He turns back. : CLARK : Do you mind? : BRUCE : Mind what? : CLARK : Just get out. : He leaves, pulling out a Star Wars comic. He removes his black sweater, exposing a star wars shirt, and puts on a Star Wars hat. Clark comes out dressed as a Jedi. : CLARK : How do I look? : BRUCE : Like a total geek. : CLARK : Perfect. : BRUCE : Come on clarkie, my Mom’s waiting. : They prepare to walk out : CLARK : How did you get into my house? : He exposes the key ring. : BRUCE : I added one of yours to my collection. : : Outside, Bruce’s mom’s car sits. : CLARK : Bruce, your mom got up at five to ferry you to my house? : BRUCE : …and to the movies. Yeah, she’s pretty controllable. I don’t really remember the last time I did anything for myself. : CLARK : …She’s not coming to the movie, right? : BRUCE : Don’t be ridiculous! She hates Star Wars. : They enter the car, which pulls out. Bruce carries a huge bag with him. : CLARK : What’s that? : BRUCE : Entertainment. It’s gonna be a long 18 hours up to Star Wars. : CLARK : What? Is that all of your star wars memorabilia? : BRUCE : No. I didn’t take Star Wars Insider from April ‘96. I couldn’t find it. : CLARK : You are such a loser. : BRUCE : Oh! This means a lot coming from the guy with a fake lightsaber on his belt. : The car is seen pulling into the parking lot. Bruce kisses his mom, and grabs his huge bag. They look out at the empty parking lot. : CLARK : Well, I wouldn’t be worried about getting in. : BRUCE : Ok, so we got some time to kill. Uhhh, why don’t we… : CLARK : Why do we have to do this, anyway? : BRUCE : What?! : CLARK : Everybody is gonna see it eventually, why do we have to be the first? : BRUCE : Hmmm….Well…. : CLARK : (Sigh) : BRUCE : We’re forging memories here. What makes star wars so great? I still remember the first time I saw it. Scared the crap out of me, but that experience is one of the happiest of my life. I just want to create a new one, with the first Star Wars in 16 years! : CLARK : Ok, fine. I’ll stick around. : They sit down, and begin to talk about random crap. The camera slides up, and fades, with the sun in a different spot. It says: 4 hours later. They lay asleep. Clark wakes up, and looks at Bruce. : CLARK : Wake up, dude. : BRUCE : Wha…what? Hey, where the heck is everybody!? : CLARK : (Looks at watch)People should be here by now! : BRUCE : Ya know, I have some errands to run. : CLARK : Okay. Leave your bag. : BRUCE : Never! What if it falls into the wrong hands?! When people show up, and they should have shown up by now, this’ll be a hot commodity. You do realize…. : CLARK : Wait… : They run over to the window of the theatre, and they look in. : CLARK : Figures! We’ve been outside for five hours, and the line is inside! : BRUCE : There must be a thousand people in there! : CLARK : (sighs) Well, what should we do? : He looks over, but Bruce is already inside. Clark runs in. : MTE : Attention! Everybody move outside, and form a line outside the building. : They sit down outside, at the end of the line. Next to them is a guy with a gameboy(Matt). Clark looks over. : CLARK : Woah. The old Return of the Jedi game. : MATT : Hi, I’m matt. : CLARK : I’m Clark, and this is Bruce. : BRUCE : Hey. : MATT : You know, I got here at 9:30, thinking I’d be the first one here. : BRUCE : HAH! We’ve been here since five-thirty! : MATT : So why are you at the end of the line? : CLARK : It’s a long story. : BRUCE : No, it’s not. We fell asleep, and all the people walked by us, into the theatre. : CLARK : They probably thought we were freeloaders or something. You, with that huge bag! : MATT : Oh. : Bruce looks down the line. : BRUCE : Hey, I don’t think we’re gonna get in. : CLARK : What do you mean? There’s only about four hundred people here. : BRUCE : Well, these facilities can only cram about three hundred people into the theatre, and we’re at the end of the line. : CLARK : Why can’t they show it in more than one theatre? : BRUCE : Look at the paper. They have already assigned theatres to specific feature films, filling each of their 20 theatres with different movies, playing simultaneously. If they don’t adhere to the predetermined and documented configuration here, they could be sued for false advertising. : MTE : ATTENTION! Only the first three hundred fifty people will be allowed into the movie! Biff will count you off! : MATT : I heard about that guy. A retired CIA agent, now security guard at the movie theatre. : CLARK : He’s like…sixteen. : BRUCE : They have operatives as young as five. They retire at eight. : MATT : They say he can kill a man in four different ways, with is pinky. : GUY : That’s not exactly true. You see, he worked at a little burger place in Warwick, as a security guard. : CLARK : Security Guard? : GUY : It wasn’t a very nice area. So, this little place had to close down. : CLARK : Why? : GUY : They say it was sabotage, by the MacDonald’s company. The guy can’t look at a picture of the hamburglar without going nuts. Some bored teenagers started the story after he got a job here, based on the whole security guard thing. : He walks down the row, counting off the people. He taps a guy far in front of Matt, and says: : BIFF : Everyone who I didn’t tap, go home! : BRUCE : What?! : BIFF : I said, GO HOME. : BRUCE : Oh, no, I’ve been up since two ‘o clock. I’m not going home, no way. : BIFF : If you’ve been up since two, why are you at the end of the line. HEH HEH HEH. : He starts flailing wildly at Biff. Clark holds him back. Biff prepares to destroy them, when he is hit by a burger in the head. He turns around, running away. : CLARK : Bruce, Bruce. Let’s just go home. : BRUCE : No! : CLARK : Then, let’s go to a different theatre : BRUCE : This is the only theatre in the state doing the midnight show! We’re seeing this movie tonight, whether we get in legally or not. You and me, Bruce, like Bruce Wayne, aka Batman, and Clark, as in Clark Kent, aka Superman. : MATT : I’m in. : BRUCE : What’s your name again? : MATT : Matt. : BRUCE : Batman, Superman…. and…. Matt Hooper from Jaws. : They walk. : CLARK : What’s the plan? : BRUCE : Well, we’re gonna buy tickets for another movie, and defying the laws of the theatre, we will then go into the place Star Wars is playing. : MATT : Wait, wait. This has a few flaws.(Bruce picks up a key, and puts it on the ring of keys) First of all, what type of creep goes to the movies at midnight unless they’re seeing Star Wars, or the Rocky horror picture show, and I’m sure, for an opening like this, they’ll be checking tickets. : They stop. : BRUCE : Plan B. We find out what theatre the movie is playing in, buy a ticket for an earlier movie being shown in that theatre, and stay in there until Star Wars. : CLARK : No, no no. Wouldn’t they get suspicious that we ask what theatre the film is in, and then buy a ticket for that same theatre. And what if its rated R, and we can’t get in, and what about the maintenance men who clean up between shows, and I’m sure biff will clean out anyone he sees in there. : They stop again. : BRUCE : Plan C. We figure out which theatre the movie is being shown in, find the outer door, and wait for it to open, thanks to someone leaving, and slipping in at about ten ‘o clock, waiting in the stairway until three minutes into the previews, and then taking a seat in the audience. : MATT : That…that could work. : They go around back, and Run into Biff by the door. : BIFF : What are you trekkies doin’? : BRUCE : My God! Why do they all do that?! It’s Star Wars, you insignifigant ex-security guard pile of toad fodder! : MATT : I think they do it to push us…well…you over the edge. : Bruce goes over to Biff. : BRUCE : Hey, buddy! Lights still on in the house? (Waves hand in front of eyes) Ok. Well, Biff….Biffy…Biffster….My friends and I are a little distraught over being sent home, after standing in line for oh, so very long. Now, I’m sure there are three seats available in that theatre, and we were hoping you could help us out…. : Biff holds out hand, expecting a bribe. : BRUCE : Ah! An incentive! : Bruce snaps at Clark, who pulls out his wallet, handing him a 20-dollar bill. Bruce puts it into Biff’s hand. He looks at it, very closely. He folds it and puts it into his pocket. The camera switches to the three being flung onto the ground in front of the theatre. They walk back to the front. : MATT : Hey, Batman, why are you so stubborn? Let’s just come back tomorrow morning. : BRUCE : Stubborn!? I’ll show you…..You called me batman. : CLARK : My God, Bruce! I’ve had enough of this stupid game! First, you woke me up at five o’ clock, very abruptly, I might add, they you drag you to this dumb premiere, make me sleep on the ground, stand around in a line, only to be sent home! But do you listen to reason, and go?! NO! You make us brainstorm for four hours, lose all my money, and even now you won’t just give up! For God’s sake, I may be your best friend, but you treat me like total garbage! Oh, and you’re the big nonconformist, right? You disregard all things pop culture, eh? Well, you’re buying into geek culture, so much for nonconformity, eh?! : With tears in his eyes, Bruce turns around, and walks away. Clark tries to follow him. Matt grabs his arm. : MATT : He’ll be back. Give him a few seconds to grasp the situation. : CLARK : What if he doesn’t come back? He’s my ride home! : In the next scene, Clark and Matt walk with sodas. They see bruce, with a small notebook, in front of a store in a plaza. They go sit with him. : CLARK : I’m sorry. : BRUCE : I was going to rip your head off, but I didn’t want to sound stupid, so I wrote up my speech.(He reads from a pad) Ahem. So much for nonconformity? Geek Culture? What is a geek? : Matt Raises his hand. : BRUCE : Hooper? : MATT : One who…is shunned by his peers due to his choices of clothing, friends, music, ect. : BRUCE : Nice definition. I’d define geek as something slightly different, though. Let’s face it, everyone has weird foibles that in a way, make them geeky. Clark, you still sleep with a teddy bear, my mom does everything for me. : CLARK : Yeah, but we’re geeks. : BRUCE : Ok. Shut up for a second. What I’m getting at is that nobody is a geek or cool because of their life choices. Lots of ‘cool’ people do weird stuff, so why aren’t they geeks? Because they are very self-conscious about what people think about them, so they hide it behind sports and cars, is suppose. I mean, what makes sports fun? It’s a bunch of guys running around, getting sweaty. These people hide their inner geeks, while those labeled as geeks, nerds, or freaks are open with their inner…stuff, and because the ‘cool’ people are intimidated that we don’t care about what people think about us, they labeled us as the outsiders. : MATT : I agree, but it can work in the opposite direction. People can be ‘individuals’ by trying to act freaky…. : CLARK : Thus hiding their true, nongeeky parts, and becoming a poser on the opposite pole. : BRUCE : Basically, it’s the people who shop at Hot Topic, Newberry Comics, or Pacific Sunwear. Ok, now, why I dragged you here. (Flips page) When was the first time you saw star wars? : CLARK : When I was five. My mom rented A new… : BRUCE : When did you get your first action figure? : CLARK : Like…two days after I first saw it. : BRUCE : You remember these events pretty fondly? : CLARK : Well, of course. I’m always the nostalgist. : BRUCE : That’s not a real word. As I mentioned earlier, why so many people flock to star wars is because of the memories and adventures it created for you. I’m just trying to make some new awesome memories, and this will prove to be one of the fondest, because of what we have to go through to get to Star Wars. I assure you. : Clark smiles. : CLARK : We’re getting into this movie. : : They walk back. A man dressed in casual clothes with a white hat, a deliveryman walks into the movie theatre with a box. : CLARK : What do you think that is? : BRUCE : I’d say that it’s Wednesday and Friday’s releases being brought in. : MATT : Do you think…. : Bruce walks into the theatre. The screen immediately flashes to bruce shouting, “RUN!!!!” He has a roll of film with him. The three antagonists run from Biff, a MTE, and the deliveryman. As Biff runs, a burger hits him in the side of the head. The Haburglar stands in another area of the parking lot. Biff starts chasing after him, instead. Clark pulls Bruce, who is staring with a confused look on their faces, with the MTE and DM chasing after them. Very quick fade to the trio sitting, watching Star Wars Episode I. Bruce Says it wasn’t worth it. Fade to credits in the traditional style of Star Wars.

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