CONSPIRACY THEORY #3

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Posted by ScreamingMonkeys at 4.23.160.66 on December 16, 2002 at 11:37:21:

This is the third installment of "Conspiracy Theory". I hope some of you enjoyed the first two. This is a new week so lets start out with something juicy. Here goes:

How many you really know the man the myth, Brian Lynch? I met him once and I must say, he’s more intimidating in his writing. In person he’s so quiet and humble. I sincerely think you should all try and meet him one day. He is truly a nice guy. Well everybody is a nice guy. But Brian, well Brian has, um Brian is. OK I’ll just say it. Have any of you ever noticed how he never takes off that coat? Any coat he wears he clings to them for dear life. Why? I have a theory and I hope you agree with me. Its common knowledge Lynch is writing Scary Movie 3. This franchise was started by some the best black comedy writers in the business, the Wayans Brothers. How does Lynch score a deal to take over for black comedy writers. I don’t think they’re looking for Kevin Smith to write the next installment of Roots. Why Lynch? Because Brian Lynch is BLACK. Yes its true. That’s why the coat stays on. Remember “Soul Man”. Well Brian couldn’t take tanning pills to be white, he had to do something more drastic. He had to put on makeup. He doesn’t put it on his whole body, just the face and hands. Well he probably uses somekind of latex for his hands. OK, some of you don’t believe me. Remember in “Chasing Amy” when he was cast as Bryan White on the minority panel at the comic con. Was that him? Well how does a white guy get on a minority panel? Is he gay? NO. He’s BLACK. If you look closely in his scene in J&SBSB he’s reading a Black Panther comic. If you saw his acting in “A Better Place” you will understand. He played a stone cold hood. You can’t just learn that stuff anywhere. That kind of stuff comes from living in the hood. I still can’t explain “Big Helium Dog”. It was a great piece of sketch comedy. Maybe he was trying to deny his blackness or maybe he was trying to make people believe he really was white. Hey, he had me fooled.

Remember folks, this is just for fun.

Enjoy.

The Screaming Monkey

Follow Ups:

I've been found out! BrianLynch 12:22:36 12/16/02 (2)
- So who is the best? ScreamingMonkeys 12:26:50 12/16/02 (0)
- I love me some Goonies refrences NT Runshouse21 12:24:23 12/16/02 (0)
I've been found out! BrianLynch 12:22:36 12/16/02 (9)
- Out of curiosity... Isis 12:26:04 12/16/02 (8)
  - Redd Foxx and Richard Pryor hands down...*NT* BChrist 12:49:33 12/16/02 (2)
    - I think we're talking current writers BrianLynch 12:51:52 12/16/02 (1)
      - Yeah, current. Isis 12:56:37 12/16/02 (0)
  - Not sure... BrianLynch 12:35:29 12/16/02 (4)
    - I agree about Morgan as well Sean the not so Beloved 13:36:55 12/16/02 (0)
    - Okay, good pick. Isis 12:39:00 12/16/02 (2)
      - I agree with Chapelle ScreamingMonkeys 12:43:23 12/16/02 (1)
        
        AND Tracy Morgan was the "Snap Champion." Championship_Vinyl 12:45:43 12/16/02 (0)
I totally believe this! Isis 12:17:16 12/16/02 (0)

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: This is the third installment of "Conspiracy Theory". I hope some of you enjoyed the first two. This is a new week so lets start out with something juicy. Here goes: : How many you really know the man the myth, Brian Lynch? I met him once and I must say, he’s more intimidating in his writing. In person he’s so quiet and humble. I sincerely think you should all try and meet him one day. He is truly a nice guy. Well everybody is a nice guy. But Brian, well Brian has, um Brian is. OK I’ll just say it. Have any of you ever noticed how he never takes off that coat? Any coat he wears he clings to them for dear life. Why? I have a theory and I hope you agree with me. Its common knowledge Lynch is writing Scary Movie 3. This franchise was started by some the best black comedy writers in the business, the Wayans Brothers. How does Lynch score a deal to take over for black comedy writers. I don’t think they’re looking for Kevin Smith to write the next installment of Roots. Why Lynch? Because Brian Lynch is BLACK. Yes its true. That’s why the coat stays on. Remember “Soul Man”. Well Brian couldn’t take tanning pills to be white, he had to do something more drastic. He had to put on makeup. He doesn’t put it on his whole body, just the face and hands. Well he probably uses somekind of latex for his hands. OK, some of you don’t believe me. Remember in “Chasing Amy” when he was cast as Bryan White on the minority panel at the comic con. Was that him? Well how does a white guy get on a minority panel? Is he gay? NO. He’s BLACK. If you look closely in his scene in J&SBSB he’s reading a Black Panther comic. If you saw his acting in “A Better Place” you will understand. He played a stone cold hood. You can’t just learn that stuff anywhere. That kind of stuff comes from living in the hood. I still can’t explain “Big Helium Dog”. It was a great piece of sketch comedy. Maybe he was trying to deny his blackness or maybe he was trying to make people believe he really was white. Hey, he had me fooled. : Remember folks, this is just for fun. : Enjoy. : The Screaming Monkey

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