ooohhhh, intelligent questions.......

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: : “What the fuck is this about loser” : : The greatest poll ever constructed… : : When man first bore the earth he has strived to create wonders and achievements beyond anything ever seen, some include the great wall of china, and the sphinx. But today a new legacy by man has been created from muscle and bone…the greatest poll ever constructed for a web board. Some say god himself must have written this poll because of the treacherous powers it holds…and even that he constructed the intricate questions themselves by means of mystical powers, but he didn’t, the truth behind the origin of this poll will be discussed and even the poll will be brought to be seen for your eyes, and minds to divulge. : : “What is the Brief history of the poll?” : : It all started out as an experiment to toy with the minds of the viewaskwewians whom in recent years had gained a reputation for a breading house of newbie (scientific name: Newbious annoyence) posters at internet web boards, they in fact have had numerous accounts of newbie posters, saying such catch phrases as “snoogans” and “bongggg”, to put it lightly. These newbies then spread like locusts to other boards and infect an entire nation of internet geeks with their mindless rambling and “stoner talk” and endanger the minds and spirits of future generations needed to run the world. : : The purpose of the poll is to confuse and baffle such posters to a state where their mind forces itself into an idle state of bewilderment then luring these newbies away from the web boards of America and into the depths of “the outside world” They then get “lives” and leave the “regulars”, or more experienced posters alone. : : “How Was this Poll Created?” : : Back in 2001, President George Bush cited this problem in his state of the union address, and called for “immediate action to be taken” as the CIA had noted the VA web board the central force in the newbian population, he then set up a committee consisting of current and former web board members, and even View Askew employees themselves (their names withheld for security reasons) to create a call for action against the newbie threat in the web board. : : They decided because of the overwhelming amount of polls on the board it could be a great decoy to lure these newbies in, then they would read too complicated of questions and either they would stray away from the board or their heads would explode, moreover creating a more peaceful and sound web board. : : “Who Created it, and When was it created?” : : In late 2001, about the time of the tragic Sept 11 attack, three scientist (names also with held) were sent into the depths of the Congo to explore the most overwhelming questions ever conceived to a newbie, and where not allowed to be free, or communicate with the outside world until this task was done. After 10 grueling weeks of isolation and bad Chinese they created what you are about to see. And please answer the questions as you go along. : : : : 1) Define the Universe. Give examples. : The universe is all matter and energy in our known existence and regarded as a whole : : 2) Would you rather be here or there? : i'd rather be anywhere but but here at the moment : : 3) Who would make a better upside-down cake Randall Graves or Dante Hicks? : Randall Graves without a shadow of a doubt : : 4) If a tree falls in the woods, and not a single person is around….does it give an equal and opposite reaction??? (which of Newton’s laws is this?) : It indeed does give an equal opposite reaction...newtons law no. 37 states that "when a tree fall'eth in the wood on no-ne doth be there, somewhere in the universe (see above) 2 hundred million pieces of paper will jump into the air at the same time. : : 5) Three bears are walking through the woods a tree falls on one of them….is it the same tree as in question 4? : For this question, we must consider newtons next law, no. 38 (or more commonly know as the "When a tree falls-forget the noise-does it kill a shitting bear law"). this states that any bear who is shitting in the woods is inversely more prone to being hit by falling silent trees. : : 6) Where in the world is Carmen Sandiego??” : you answered that yourself in the question..... : : 7) Pie is used to determine what? Is it delicious, yes or no? : pi expresses the ratio of the circumference to the diameter of a circle and appears as a constant in many mathematical expressions. : : : Follow up for bonus kudos……How many calories is in one McDonalds apple pie? : 360 : : & finally : : 8) What time is it on the moon? : tea-time : : Okay, okay so some was trivia but who cares it should still weed out the boys from men…the girls from woman, and the newbies from the rest… : : !!PEACE!! Love and harmony : : Kevin H.

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