Is Keven Smith my daddy?

Subject:

Comments:
: I figured there wasn't enough blatant comments of a libelous or exploiting nature, so... (see what happens when I'm bored?).. and since Kevin is getting more known all the time, it's about time we had a nice tabloid quality post.. and I need answers! : Anyway, on with my story... way back when, 29 years ago, my mother worked as an ape keeper in a local zoo. In fact, this zoo was so local, the ape was actually a raccoon -- don't blame them, "dem folks' didn't know no better". : As far as I can tell, by the pictures and the stories my dearly departed mother told me, it was indeed Kevin Smith that young man that caught my mother's eye down by the kangaroo cages. : What I really want to know is... nothing... I'll wait till you cash in the hundred million dollar movies, then I'll come a-knockin', "pa". : /start normal fan rant... : Actually, I was pleased to find this site -- I never looked before. Also, a thank you to Kevin, because Clerks and MallRats helped relax me and put me in a better mood through some of the horrible times as of this last week. No ranting from a fan, but a genuine thanks, as it's a great talent to have to make people laugh, and sometimes it's very much needed and I appreciate it. : /end normal fan rant... : : /start wacko fan rant... : Oh, Kevin Smith, you are my idol! I worship you! I like to collect those Chiquita banana stickers and use them to create two dimensional, life size characters of you. Of course, you're mostly yellow... I thought to myself "Am I a big enough fan to stalk him?", but then I remembered I'm just way too lazy and I'm not a very driven person.. so, the answer was inevitably "no, I'm just way too lazy"... : /end wacko fan rant... : Now that you know all my dirty secrets about certain brands of food labels stuck on fruit at the super market, let's get down to it -- My wife and I would be honored if you could cast our *very talented* house cat in your next movie. Alternatively, we have a very attractive house plant. Either way, we'd be honored. : Uh oh, the "voices" are starting again, I better go before they found out I got access to the outside! : Cheers! : tim@chatbase.com

Optional Link URL:
Link Title:
Optional Image URL: