Yes, but don't tell anyone. It'll be our secret.

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: Kidding. : : Hey, speaking of whom, how's he doing? : Ben? Quite well. : : Have you spoken with him lately? : Yes - just last week. : : I tried to figure out an address where I could mail him a birthday card : and a few words of encouragement a few weeks back, and, well, it was almost : impossible. : You can send Ben mail to his agent, Patrick Whitesell (sp?) at the Endeavor : Agency (also, coincidentally, my agency, though not my agent; that dubious : honor belongs to Phil Raskind). : I trust you've spoken with him, and I trust that he's recovering. : You, sir, are very trusting. : :If you do speak to him soon, Mr. Smith, please do pass on the best wishes : of the VA fans : He's a reader of this board, so he'll come across this. : You read that, all you young ladies who'd fall victim to the charms of : Jason Mewes when he urges you to "Cum to chat"? Ben's a READER; not a : POSTER. In other words, please don't litter the board with "BEN!! BEN, : READ AND ANSWER THIS!!!" posts. : : But enough about Mr. Affleck, let's talk about you for a while. : Okay. : : You're licking your box office wounds? : Well, not anymore. : : Honestly, I am, too. I spent most of the summer informing my friends who : had never heard of your work that, "This is the movie of the summer, just : you watch. It'll bury American Pie 2, Rush Hour 2, and even Cats and : Dogs." : In terms of pure laughs or quality, most would say we did. : In terms of Box Office, most - if not all - would say you were on crack. : : I, too, overestimated the box office legs of the movie (my original : prediction was 75 million domestic), : We were all hoping for forty to fifty ourselves. : : but I don't know where to find fault for the flick not reaching its : audience: it's a broad-strokes comedy that should've found a broad : audience. Do you have any ideas, Mr. Smith, regarding what happened? : At the end of the day, Jay and Silent Bob had about thirty million dollars : worth of fans. Not too shabby, but not exactly pie-fucking numbers either. : :It wasn't poorly marketed, in my eyes, : It was tough to cut great spots, what with all the language; but no, it : wasn't poorly marketed. : : and I don't even think that the hard R hurt it that much. : Sure didn't hurt 'AP2'. : :I'd love to entertain your thoughts for a while, especially in light of : the fantastic numbers the film did in previews. : You remember a little picture called 'Almost Famous'? Everyone loved it, : and it did around thirty million bucks at the box office. : How about a picture called 'Fight Club'? Same thing. : A flick called 'Billy Madison'? : What about that movie 'Dogma'. : Who's to say why flicks that people love pop or don't pop at the box : office? Does it really matter? It's like worrying about dick size past : the age of fifteen: sooner or later you catch on that while size matters a : little, what matters more is what you do with what you've got. : Mind you, not that I'm speaking from experience. I mean, I've got, like, : an armadillo hanging between my legs. : A-hem... : Anyhoo, my closing thoughts on box office are thus: can you tell me, off : the top of your head, without rushing to a box office archives website, : what 'Ferris Beuller' did? How about 'The Breakfast Club'? How much did : 'Raising Arizona' eventually tally up? You don't know, do you (again, : without looking it up)? Regardless, they're still remembered very fondly, : and watched incessantly today. : The same will be true of 'Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back', if 'Clerks' and : 'Mallrats' are any indication. And at the end of the day, longevity, to : me, is far more satisfying than big box office. : : Regardless of the box office, just know that you've got a ticket sold to : me for whatever you put out in the future, regardless. : Thanks. I'm counting on that. : : I'm the Affleck of your audience, so to speak. : Meaning you make fifteen million a picture and fuck starlets? If that's : the case, what the hell are you doing sitting around watching my flicks? : : Thanks for dropping by, Kevin, and perhaps once this place calms down : with the twelve year olds, and you iron out the details on the next flick, : we'll see more of you again? I certainly hope so. : Me too. : ********** : *******

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