Posted by Lycanthrope at spider-mtc-tb071.proxy.aol.com on June 15, 2001 at 15:46:23:
Has anyone caught Chevy Chase's opinion of Jason Lee? I mean, you would wonder how someone would feel about another person reprising one of your greatest movie roles ever (the whole Lee-as-Fletch thing, for those of you not in the know). Although, Chase has always got the Tom Brandston character from Snow Day under his belt. No one can take that away from him.
And now, some freestyle poetry:
Put a CD on a record turntable listening to the devil’s music on American Hi-fi singing with a voice like that of a grape-flavored gorilla who shoots Cheetos out of his parachute mouth into a lake of blood and fire where dead mermaids converse with horny sailors who visit the mainland for a quick fuck and a chance to feel the sturdy ground.
Newspapers advertising bad movies with good actors and smelly mountain-men, making moonshine in a space shuttle, talking about how they could’ve been Bill Gates and had all of the Martian vixens in their overall pockets.
Fuck shit damn, profanity in a velvet envelope tells secret stories to the Midnight Society, even though all of the kids in it are dead from inhaling the sick smoke of burning magic flash dust that each one of them threw into the campfire before each story.
Nickelodeon is going to Hell for canceling Ren & Stimpy, and MTV is going to Heaven for saving Jesus from drowning in a kiddie pool while the Baywatch chicks watch in confusion, eating popcorn and nickels.
The Mummy Returns is a sex slave for Fight Club.
Wow... what the fuck? Okay, I need to take a nap...