Kevin-I also got a message from Jesus! no shit!

[ Follow Ups ] [ Post Followup ] [ The View Askew WWWBoard ] [ FAQ ]

Posted by 3Eves at on March 29, 2001 at 14:28:53:

Dude, I think I am the fucking chick you got a dream about before you made Dogma. At least, I think you got it all in a dream.

My messages started last fall with a psychic reading. This woman starting talking to "someone" on the other side who knew everything I've ever done.

At that time I was told I would have great commercial success with a movie I wrote (by the way, I write) and that some powerful folks would produce. But his letter is not a ploy for help with work, we have a much more important connection.

I was told I had a strong connection to you. But I didn't really think much of it at the time.

Since then, I have had so much freaky shit happen to me, too much to tell you about in this message. But let me tell you, before this I was totally against organized religion and I did NOT believe Christ wanted us to worship him and I did NOT believe in a real devil.

Too much to mention now. But I can say, so much has happened that I have been moved to get the fuck out of town and head back to Jersey to try to get you to read my screen play. It was when I was thinking about this that I finally watched Dogma (for only the second time) and had more revelations. I really believe I am that fucking Linda F. character. And it struck me when I saw that scene where she started flipping out and said "this is too big" and told God she hated him.

Kevin, I flipped out in the same exact way. And said the same exact thing, verbatim. No shit. When I realized I had really been contacted. Only, I freaked out much worse, in my bedroom, and starting banging my head into my door. And now, (did I tell you I'm from Eatontown?) I am making a fucking pilgramage back to Jersey, just like in your movie. I am not a freak! Well, I am now! But I wasn't before! I was selling advertising for Muvico Theaters but quit last summer when I was compelled to only try creative things. Well, financially, that's not working out too well. I also sing, but I don't want shitty jobs, I have always had kind of an 'attitude'. Now I really believe it is my old and frankly, superior soul.

Dude! I can't believe I finally got smart enough to post you this message. I was told you didn't really like talking about how you got the Dogma story because you feel like a freak, and no one believes you. Well, no one fucking believes me. And I am honestly afraid the people I have told may try and put me in a hospital or jail. Dude, the Loki and Bartleby thing, it's fucking real. And I know this sounds really nutty, but from what the other side has told me, Matt really is Loki, but Bartelby, well, I can't tell you who he is because he is an asshole (not really, but he is hurting me by not helping me). I went to Muvico and asked them to contact him, I told them about my 'messages from God'. I believe they contacted him out of fear, thinking I was a wacko, and from the messages I have gotten from the other side (like predicting a million friggin' things I did in the last few months) I really believe he is watching me via satellite. Only he is too mistrusting to believe me even though I have given him tons of info that there is no way I would have ever known.

Anyway, I didn't mean to write so much info in this first message. But I am freaking out. Here is one concrete piece the other side gave me. Check it out. After I quit Muvico, I happened upon my first professional (if you could call it that) writing job at a start up magazine called Upbeat Senior. The only reason I got the job was because they were a start up. Anyway, in the first week of this job I was making advertising calls for them, drumming up some free ads for out prototype. I make contact with a woman who used to date a man in the blues music industry. She offers to connect me for some stories because the blues festival was coming to town. That day I was put in contact with Dan Hicks, Walter Trout, Tinsley Ellis and Bernard Allison. So I get all their cds. Now, the psychic had told me this Dan Hicks cd would be very very significant to me. Only I did not get it until the last month. First of all, I liked Dan's cd a lot. It reminded me of a sophisticated Jimmy Buffet. Only, I've never liked Jimmy Buffet. I especially liked the first two songs, one about "buying crappy magazines" and the second is about 'not giving up food for love' or probably anything else. I related to that because I have always used food for one reason or another, but not usually for the right reasons! (ha ha)

Anyway, it was the last month, with some major revelations (everytime I make the 'right' decision I get more info from the other side, just call me Haley Joel Osmond, a regular fucking freak). SO, it was when I started really believing I had actually been contacted by Jesus that I went back over the Dan Hicks cd. Dude, it is fucking freaky in a major way. The first song says 'buy your magazines round the corner', which I do. And 'you've probably heard my name before, you can read about me on pages 12 and 43'. Okay, so I FINALLY look up this shit in the Bible, right? And on pages 12 and 43 it tells of two brothers who are basically pitted against one another for some land. And on the other page, it tells about a woman being impregnated by her husband's brother. Dude, especially the latter story is exactly what I was told, regarding me. I have received all these messages about me, and some brothers (on a spirit level) and fallen angels, who will help deliver the world back to God. By the way, your
story was very close, but you were wrong about God not wanting the angels back, he does, and they are key in fighting the (I can't believe I am saying this) friggin' Devil. Anyway, the bulk of my messages were about my finding my 'soulmates' in Hollywood, through my writing and then marrying the right man in order to have God's children.

I know I sound nuts, but since you also received messages, I have no where else to turn. And actually, I suppose this was God's intention. They told me my relationship with you would be very important, but I tried to contact one of those damned fallen angels first, BIG MISTAKE! All they are doing is watching me and laughing at me. I believe Matt saw some satellite footage of me already, but I am not sure. I have gotten so many messages, I don't know which ones are right. I know I have gotten a lot right, but I had a few predictions that did not come true, so now I hesitate to say anything, only I have no other choice! I MUST get through to someone who can help me!I'll tell you one prediction I got wrong. I believed Joaquin would win the Oscar. Because I was not only told he was one of my "hollywood' soulmates but that I had a 'hollywood soulmate' who had won two Oscars. She mentioned Matt, but I was like, naw....And she had mentioned a party where I WAS years ago, where I had an encounter with Joaquin that really happened. It supposedly set off a chain reaction that effected River, who I may has well say now, was the first person to contact me, by giving me info on this party, where I friggin was! It was a cast party for a children's theater group called The Kids Company. And I do know for a fact that Joaquin knew people I knew (after leaving Jersey, my mom moved us to Orlando), and the person on the other side, described the party, the dress I was wearing and a song I was singing. Anyway, because of this, I believed. Right? So, anyway, when the psychic said I had this other soulmate who won Oscars, I figured Joaquin would win this year, and because I was told I would have so much success (my first movie is really good, not the crap you normally get, and not the crap we normally see on screen, besides your movies of course), I figured maybe he would win his second with something I wrote.

Anyway, Matt is irrelevant, I know now I should have contacted you first. Okay, so, where was I? Shit. Anyway, I have never looked up 'pages' in a song in the Bible. My whole family knows I used to rag people worshipping Christ. Not that I was not a big fan of his teachings, and I seriously believed in reincarnation and eternal life. I just didn't think Jesus wanted us to worship him in the way the church has told us to and I thought they had gotten a lot wrong and I did not believe there was a Devil. But there it is, in the Bible, two stories just like the ones I was told about. And on 'page 92', in the song, it says 'you can find a cookin' little recipe on page 92, all you're needin' is a fellow'. This is for animal sacrifice, GROSS! But one of my messages was about incorporating some weird ass voodoo, witch shit into a new religion that they want me to start. Jesus wants a new fucking religion, Kevin. It is basically Buddhism that worships Christ and I guess some animal sacrifice.

Well, I can't get a hold of Dan Hicks, I blew them off last fall when the magazine stopped paying me. Now they won't take my questions. Plus, everyone I contact thinks I'm nuts. But I was given more clues to ask Dan. One, I believe he got the music in '93 or '94, I don't know why. And I also believe he was going to write the word 'tomato' in the second song three times (3 is a significant number for me for some reason), but Dan thought that is was too many tomatoes so he changed one tomato to 'potato'.

There is something else, with Walter Trout. Whom I had a nice interview with, but I have since tried to contact him (he was going to have me backstage to see him in Palm Beach, but won't return my calls now!, duh, I wonder why...). Anyway, I was told my relationship with him was very signifcant. Okay, on his last cd, not the new one, it is from two years ago. It has a song on it, "Sweet Butterfly, (Sophie's Song)". This song really moved me, did I tell you I had been in a really bad relationship for the last seven years? And that I had really wanted to break up with my now ex for years, but didn't out of guilt, like he had done so much for me, blah blah blah, stupid, right? Well, this song, and I am not one of those "oh Brittney, your song really inspired me" type of people. Okay, this song moved me so much, I really knew I had to end my relationship with my ex. Which I did, on Dec. 3rd, okay, the VERY DAY the psychic told me last September that my life would do a complete 180, totally turn around and change in a major way, starting with the break up.

So, I kept the song in mind and wrote it into my first movie (I KNOW my second movie is about THIS story, all of my 'revelations' and 'info' have been given to me in the form of 'memories', of the psychic telling me, basically, I believe Jesus gave me this stuff in movie format, and there is more, it's about his messages coming from Hollywood because people won't listen otherwise). Okay, so I write it into my movie, even though it really doesn't fit, my movie is all about seventies music. Which is partly because I can sing just like Anne Murray and Karen Carpenter and had planned on recording my own versions, right? Anyway, the pyschic said Walter was significant, and this song. So, I don't know when I realized it, like I said, I get 'revelations' when I make the 'correct' decisions. And when I belive in myself and I don't spaz out. So, Walter had told me the song was for his friend's daughter, Sophie, who had died. A couple years ago, my ex boyfriends son had found a kitten eating from the dumpster of his place of employment. They brought her to me, and I don't know why, but I named her Sophie. I filled up the tub with water, it was too high, I put her in for a bath and panicked for a second because I thought she would sink, but she didn't, she floated up and starting swimming, very calmly, I may add. So, at that moment, I got a thought, WHAM! Pushed into my head, it said 'Sophie the Swimming Wonder Cat'. And I instantly had an idea for a children's story, about Sophie the swimming wonder cat who taught people they if they believed in themselves they could do anything. Okay, after some revelations in the last couple months, I somehow get the thought that Walter's friends' daughter did not die choking like they told him, but that she drowned and they were ashamed, they think it's their fault. Only it's not, I believe she friggin' died to make people believe me. This is awful sounding at first! Believe me, I have cried many tears for my little Sophie. But this shit is real, Kevin, and since you are who you are, you have to help me. I think YOU may be the other friggin' apostle. Oh, did I mention a big message I got is that Jesus really was black and is pissed at us white folks? Oh, and I contacted Walter in the last few weeks, asking him to verify this info, but as I said, no response! And he said he was re-born too, funny, how not a single re-born Christian will even consider this stuff.

Okay, one more thing, a major thing, well, there is more, but something really major happened yesterday. I happened to meet two women in the last year who worked at the Latin Quarter. I met one through my Meals on Wheels route and the other I had to interview for Upbeat Senior. I found it very interesting, I have always loved old anything. But thought not much of it. But since all my revelations in the last month....well, one thing the psychic had told me is that I truly am majorly connected on the other side, and that me and my soul mates are true 'hollywood royalty' (and did I mention I do NOT want to be an actress? I want to produce my stuff and be an agent. But they said you guys would really want me to act too, whatever, anyway). Anyway, she had made a 'rat pack' connection, right? So, I think I was rewarded yesterday, for not freaking out when my Joaquin prediction did not come true, I didn't freak partly because I had just recently gotten the Matt connection and had started thinking he was my Oscar winning soul mate, they had told me "someone just like me" who had done some similar stuff, writing something, making people listen. Anyway, I do not want you to contact him, CONTACT ME DUDE!!! Anyway, so I didn't freak out, right? ANd the next day was my Meals on Wheels day. And this client of mine, Virginia Bocchino, her sister worked at the Latin Quarter for nine years (as Mary Bokino and the other woman's name is Shirley Arkin, but that is her married name).

She has been asking to take me to lunch for months, but I always turned her down because one, I give them enough time ( ha ha ) and two, I really didn't want her to spend her money on me (but now that I'm a starving artist...) So I go right, and right away, I am getting voices about her doing a HUGE job for Jesus ( and I know this is freaky, but a big part of the message is about abortion). Right? So at lunch, she just out of the blue tells me she witnessed an illegal abortion her sister had where the baby had his "private parts" at only two months. Okay, then she starts telling me about partying with friggin' Frank Sinatra, Dean Martin and Elvis when her sister worked at the Latin Quarter. And I start getting excited voices telling me about the movie I will make, and my hollywood soulmates playing parts in it, and me hypnotizing these women to get more stories out of them! And we're driving along listening to Dean Martin, and I have voices telling me what a significant day it is, and that Dean's family will love me. I am telling you, the person I sent my first manuscript to (which is all freaked out, because I had just started getting messages, and I thought I had to do the resurrection and all this other shit), I just know they are keeping an eye on me via satellite. And if they aren't, everything I have gone through will be recreated. One of the first things the psychic had told me is that I would be like 'an Ally McBeal of the Real World'. And that there would be all this footage of me doing all the stuff I HAVE BEEN DOING!

So, I was told I was connected to the rat pack, but didn't believe it. But now I am friggin' believing it! Dude, the psychic who started this, she was only used as a blind tool, but she is at 7th Heaven in Tampa, and her name is Andrea, she never remembers me when I call. The number there is 813-242-0400.

She is a numerologist. You should look into it too, my birthday is 12/27/71. Another significant birthday for me, the one I won't give you the name for, is 7/3/62. Check it out, along with yours. I have so many other things to tell you and you have to read my manuscripts. They said they would be the 'new dead sea scrolls', I know this sounds fucked up! But I KNOW it is real!!! Too many things keep happening to me that they told me I would be doing! One of which is contacting you via the messge board. I thought I would reach dumb and dumber (matt and the other) via the greenlight message board, but I think that was wrong. I think YOU were the first person I would reach this way. And I think it is because you got messages you don't like discussing. Did I mention it was project greenlight that really got me off my ass and started on my first screenplay? Which sucked, but turned into something really good, called Change in Motion. The friggin' psychic told me I would win Oscars with it.
Oh, another soul mate of mine is supposed to be fucking George Lucas, run his birthday, it's supposedly 5/14/44.

Dude, you are the one I need! And I was told I would connect with you. I just thought it would be after my 'hollywood producer' called me. I can tell you, the psychic told me someone very powerful in Hollywood with certain initials would produce my film, and he was my soul mate. Right? And she says, you have a poster of him in your house but you haven't put it up yet. Which I did have, an action movie, that sort of hypnotized me, which is very unusual for me, I don't normally like action movies. But I liked this movie a lot, so I snaked a poster from work. So, she described the poster, the day I would put it up and the revelation I would get when I did. Which I did. She told me the week I would get the final ideas for "change in motion", and I did.

I am in major need of help. I have no one to turn to. I quit my good job last summer, a job where they paid me on outstanding contracts, so it has been supporting me. But my money has run out. ANd my Orlando family, whom have never believed in me, and my mother has always been a terrible mother anyway, even though they are re-born Christians, the minute I mention 'talking to Jesus' they think I'm nuts. So, there is more, I am supposed to have a whole bunch of great re-incarntated old souls around me down here. Only, they are all poor, and they don't believe me either! So, I was planning on driving up there and sleeping along the way in my car and mooching off my relatives until I could get someone in your office to read my screenplay, because I know you will want it, whether this shit is true or not, which it is. Before I realized this stuff was true, I wrote it with you in mind to direct. It has a musical twist, very funny, and all about positive change. And it starts out with a Carpenter song and a drive along the Jersey coast, you will love it.

Anyway, here we go. Ready to change the world? I am going to blow your mind dude. I need help ASAP! I am trying very hard to remain sane. I know this stuff is real, only it is very hard because I am basically all alone. I have two friends who 'believe' me, yet, at the same time, I really don't think they totally believe me. Oh, and DON'T call Muvico YET! They think I am insane! I marched into their office last month and told them I was the Holy Spirit because all this stuff happened to me and I really believed God would help me out with a booming voice! Don't laugh! It's not fucking funny! I KNOW you got messages too and you HAVE to help me! HELP HELP HELP!

And again, I am NOT looking for you to contact Matt!!! ERRRR I am NOT a total fucking dork! I have always been a movie freak, but never a collector of star shit.

Write me quick Kevin!

(Friggin' Eve)
(so they say)

Follow Ups:

Post a Followup




Optional Link URL:
Link Title:
Optional Image URL:


[ Follow Ups ] [ Post Followup ] [ The View Askew WWWBoard ] [ FAQ ]